when God teaches a lesson using 'saved by the bell'.

yesterday was my first day as a sunday school teacher.
to say i was excited would be the understatement of the year.

i would like to tell you the kids listened and hung on my every word.
i would like to tell you they all participated in the activities.
i would like to tell you that once class was over, i felt accomplished.

but those things didn't happen.

to most of the kids, i was invisible.
i had to ask multiple times for kids to participate.
when class was over, i felt like a defeated failure.

after church, my parents and i went to eat at boomerang.
they gave me great advice and dad said something that really made sense:
"the devil is going to try to bring you down in any way he can right now. he doesn't like that you are excited. he will take this and make it more than it is if you let him."
my parents are kinda smart, ya know.

but what happened when i got home is nothing short of divine intervention.

i flipped on saved by the bell when i got home.
the episode i chose (without realizing it) was the one where the students become the teachers.
when the students wouldn't listen to kelly as she was teaching, mr. belding offered her advice that hit me right square in the eyes:
"it looks like you lost control of your class. now that reflects on the teacher as much as the students."
i felt like mr. belding was talking to me.

i was trying so hard to be the "fun" teacher.
i was trying so hard to be exactly like meagan.
i was trying so hard. too hard.

i realize there are a few things i could have done differently.
i know some changes i can make next week.
i also see the lies satan tried to feed me.

most of all, i am not giving up. mama didn't raise no fool.

i am still excited to teach. i know the Lord will use this experience for the good. 
i just needed to be reminded of exactly why i am there: to teach the kids about Jesus, not show them how fun i am.